Because My Need Isn't As Great?
Since I wasn't doing anything at work last week, I had a lot of time to think about random things. From, "Maybe I should cut my hair all off again?" To "Does my boss (at the agency) not like people who don't support the NRA?" (He had NRA paraphernalia spotted throughout his office.)
Anyway, I had a lot of time think; since all I was doing was sitting. And I thought about a conversation I had with an acquaintance of mine the week before.
See, the new job I am starting tomorrow was a job he had applied for as well. However, when I interviewed for the job, it didn't even cross my mind that he had possibly interviewed there as well. But after I got back from the interview, it hit me. "We have the same recruiter."
So I emailed him and asked him if he had interviewed there too. My concern was more selfish for me. I don't want to compete against him for a job. He's been doing search a year longer than me. I've done more aggressive stuff, but his resume is killer. I really wanted the job, and had gotten my heart wrapped up in getting it. If I had known he was my competition, I wouldn't have gotten so wrapped up. I would have been more cautious. That way, if I didn't get the job, I wouldn't be as disappointed.
My acquaintance wrote me back and said, "Yeah I've talked to them. It's not a right fit for me... (Yada, yada, yada.)"
That part was cool. I was happy about that. Made me feel better for "falling so hard" for the job opportunity.
But, in the email, he also wrote something that I was initially put off by; but then tried hard to put behind me. He wrote:
"Thanks for checking in with me. As time goes on, I think we will all have to check in with each other to see who is planning to interview for what...maybe weigh out who needs the job more."
What? "Who needs the job more?" WTF?
That was my initial reaction to the comment. But then I reasoned that he didn't mean it in a way that was putting me down. So I put it aside and moved on.
Well, then last week, as I was sitting at my desk, I started thinking about it again. And the thought crept back into my head...
"Is he suggesting that my need for the job isn't as great as his or someone else's?"
Seriously. This is what I thought. Like I wrote, I don't think he meant it as a slam against me. But, this is a person who has made comments to me in the past (back when I worked with him) regarding my work situation.
For example, at one company I worked at, I was known for being very strong and not being afraid to stick up for myself if I thought I was being over-looked or not being given credit for a project. (Though, I stuck up for everyone. Not just myself. If people did great things they deserved to be recognized. Not be lost in the "political favoritism" of that work place.)
Well, when I stuck up for myself one time, he said to me (in summary), "You know... You act as though you don't need this job and you don't realize that this is other people's livelihoods and they have to work here too."
Basically, he was passively-aggressively telling me that my outspoken nature was REALLY rubbing people the wrong way. And people were interpret ting it as "She doesn't need this job for financial reasons. Otherwise she wouldn't be acting this way."
I told him he was wrong. (And if he had bothered to actually talk to me, he would know this.) I have always been in outspoken person.That will never change. And you know what, buddy? I am doing just fine in life with my instincts.
I was offended back then and with his recent email comment that he thought my need for a job wasn't as great as his or someone else's.
Newsflash people: Money isn't the only reason someone has a job. A job is a career. (At least that is how I have always approached it.) It has always been more important to me that I be happy with how I feel at a company. I ask myself the following questions wherever I am working:
Sure, the salary question is in there. But it's probably the least important question for me. Only once in my career have I ever had to "negotiate" beyond an initial offer. And job I have ever taken, I was perfectly happy with the initial offer.
So while I can agree with my acquaintance's assumption that "money isn't the most critical thing to me," I do take offense (a little) to his assumption that my need for what looks like a GREAT job isn't as great as possibly his or someone else's.
My life is so much more than my job. (A lesson I learned last year especially.) And I refuse to be truly unhappy and frustrated somewhere. And if I wasn't committed to a company, I wouldn't stick up for myself. I would just leave. Life's too short to stay in a place where your most important criteria aren't valued or considered.
But when you come across a company where all the pieces fall into place and you have the potential to be doing exactly what you want and be successful at it, well, then I do have a great need for the place.
I said it before and I will say it again... "Money isn't everything."
For me, curiosity and learning/doing new things have led to happiness all of my life. I truly believe that if I follow my instincts on those things, any financial needs I have will be met. So far, life has played out that way. And I appreciate more than anyone what I have and what I am.
Anyway, I had a lot of time think; since all I was doing was sitting. And I thought about a conversation I had with an acquaintance of mine the week before.
See, the new job I am starting tomorrow was a job he had applied for as well. However, when I interviewed for the job, it didn't even cross my mind that he had possibly interviewed there as well. But after I got back from the interview, it hit me. "We have the same recruiter."
So I emailed him and asked him if he had interviewed there too. My concern was more selfish for me. I don't want to compete against him for a job. He's been doing search a year longer than me. I've done more aggressive stuff, but his resume is killer. I really wanted the job, and had gotten my heart wrapped up in getting it. If I had known he was my competition, I wouldn't have gotten so wrapped up. I would have been more cautious. That way, if I didn't get the job, I wouldn't be as disappointed.
My acquaintance wrote me back and said, "Yeah I've talked to them. It's not a right fit for me... (Yada, yada, yada.)"
That part was cool. I was happy about that. Made me feel better for "falling so hard" for the job opportunity.
But, in the email, he also wrote something that I was initially put off by; but then tried hard to put behind me. He wrote:
"Thanks for checking in with me. As time goes on, I think we will all have to check in with each other to see who is planning to interview for what...maybe weigh out who needs the job more."
What? "Who needs the job more?" WTF?
That was my initial reaction to the comment. But then I reasoned that he didn't mean it in a way that was putting me down. So I put it aside and moved on.
Well, then last week, as I was sitting at my desk, I started thinking about it again. And the thought crept back into my head...
"Is he suggesting that my need for the job isn't as great as his or someone else's?"
Seriously. This is what I thought. Like I wrote, I don't think he meant it as a slam against me. But, this is a person who has made comments to me in the past (back when I worked with him) regarding my work situation.
For example, at one company I worked at, I was known for being very strong and not being afraid to stick up for myself if I thought I was being over-looked or not being given credit for a project. (Though, I stuck up for everyone. Not just myself. If people did great things they deserved to be recognized. Not be lost in the "political favoritism" of that work place.)
Well, when I stuck up for myself one time, he said to me (in summary), "You know... You act as though you don't need this job and you don't realize that this is other people's livelihoods and they have to work here too."
Basically, he was passively-aggressively telling me that my outspoken nature was REALLY rubbing people the wrong way. And people were interpret ting it as "She doesn't need this job for financial reasons. Otherwise she wouldn't be acting this way."
I told him he was wrong. (And if he had bothered to actually talk to me, he would know this.) I have always been in outspoken person.That will never change. And you know what, buddy? I am doing just fine in life with my instincts.
I was offended back then and with his recent email comment that he thought my need for a job wasn't as great as his or someone else's.
Newsflash people: Money isn't the only reason someone has a job. A job is a career. (At least that is how I have always approached it.) It has always been more important to me that I be happy with how I feel at a company. I ask myself the following questions wherever I am working:
- Is this adding to my long-term career growth?
- Do I feel like I will be or am getting credit for my contributions?
- Do I feel like I am challenged and constantly learning new things? (Because, seriously, I get bored very easily.)
- Do I like the people I work with? Or are they just bi-atches?Is it possible to have a work-life balance at this place? (This has become one of the most important questions in my life.)
- Do I feel like this is a company that is truly working towards furthering itself? Or is it so built up in it's own cultural mind-set that we really aren't doing anything to further ourselves; but more just feeding our own egos with the "we're the best and no one can top us" mentality? (Basically, are we"down to earth and hard workers?" or are us and our product a bunch of "BS?")
- Am I being paid a fair salary for what I am contributing?
Sure, the salary question is in there. But it's probably the least important question for me. Only once in my career have I ever had to "negotiate" beyond an initial offer. And job I have ever taken, I was perfectly happy with the initial offer.
So while I can agree with my acquaintance's assumption that "money isn't the most critical thing to me," I do take offense (a little) to his assumption that my need for what looks like a GREAT job isn't as great as possibly his or someone else's.
My life is so much more than my job. (A lesson I learned last year especially.) And I refuse to be truly unhappy and frustrated somewhere. And if I wasn't committed to a company, I wouldn't stick up for myself. I would just leave. Life's too short to stay in a place where your most important criteria aren't valued or considered.
But when you come across a company where all the pieces fall into place and you have the potential to be doing exactly what you want and be successful at it, well, then I do have a great need for the place.
I said it before and I will say it again... "Money isn't everything."
For me, curiosity and learning/doing new things have led to happiness all of my life. I truly believe that if I follow my instincts on those things, any financial needs I have will be met. So far, life has played out that way. And I appreciate more than anyone what I have and what I am.
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