They Just Aren't The Same.

My good friends, Frogger and Bail, tried to mail me some Cheez-Its today from Boston. They hit a roadblock in their kind efforts...

I am sorry to tell you, Missus, that UPS would not let me send you Cheez-Its without insuring them for at least $250. Apparently, US does this w/ food so that when the foreign customs department rips through the boxes and steals the food (which, apparently, happens often), the US is not liable for the loss. While I do love Cheez-Its, and I want to provide you with all the comforts of your American home, I can think of a lot of things I can do with $250.

However, I have two boxes of Cheez-Its and I will give Bail a box, and the two of us will eat the Cheez-Its together and toast to you... probably with a few bottles of wine that when added up will total close to $250.

I appreciate that they tried. But for the love of Sweet Baby Jesus on Christmas morning... Why the hell are they not available here???

In all my sadness, I walked to the Whole Foods to get some veggies for dinner. And I saw these on the "cracker aisle."

I brought them home, poured a glass of red wine, and tried a few.

"Eww!"

They just aren't the same as the real thing.

Oh Canada.