Penelope Trunk Is a Dumbass Betch Too.

Wow... How many dumbass bitches are out there today?

Earlier, its was Charlotte Allen who was a dumbass bitch. But now she is being joined by Penelope Trunk in that honor.

Why?

Well, because she has a piece in the Globe today titled, "Want to have a baby? Now's the time: Women eager to have children need to direct career drive toward mating."

Now, I will state up front that I do recognize that Ms. Trunk gears this message (in the title of her piece) towards women who are "eager" to have offspring. However, I still think she is a dumbass bitch.

Why?

Well, I don't think SCARING women into having children is the answer. Matters of love and family take time. You can't just pick a random guy, get married, have a baby and expect to be happy for the rest of your life. These things take time. You don't want to have to get divorced if you don't have to. And I do believe very strongly that there are many reasons in life to get divorced.

But before you jump into marriage and become a baby-making factory, you need to be confident in what you're doing. You need to examine who you are, and who the person you are marrying is. You have to realize that you can't make people change. And if they're not a person you want to marry "as-is", then you can't rush into marriage in the hope that they will change.

Here are my favorite parts of dumbass bitch Penelope Trunk's article:

"...you have your whole life to get a career... If you are past your early twenties, and you're single and want to have children, you need to find a partner now. Take that career drive and direct it toward mating - your ovaries will not last longer than your career." I CERTAINLY DO NOT believe that "you have your whole life to get a career." Fuck no. Getting off the gravy train to pop out babies is a personal decision based on the priorities a woman has. But using scare tactics to get women to pop off the train earlier than expected is wrong. And the sad truth is that it is very hard to get back on the career track once you opt out. And you need to recognize that before you jump off of it.

"Waiting until your midthirties to start a family, if you want to carry the babies yourself, is a risky endeavor. Which means, of course, you probably want to find a partner by the time you're 30." Fucking life begins at 30, in my opinion. You are far enough in your career to be making some decent money... You know your self and what you want way more clearly than you did at 25. You know how to look after you. If you're lucky enough to have found someone who respects you for who you are by the time you are 25, then lucky you. But if you haven't, then don't go and settle just to have to a kid.

"The good news is that psychology research shows you will gain more happiness anyway by finding a partner than by having a good job." Um, really? Then why the FUCK do 50% of marriages end in fucking divorce, dumbass bitch Penelope Trunk? What she's suggesting is that women need to go out there and "get a partner for God's sake" just so they can ensure they can have a child. I think telling women that, "you need to have babies and a partner over being able to financially support yourself" is dangerous.

So, should women who are in their 30s and not making it a priority to have babies not bother trying?

My suggestion: How about we teach girls from a young age that they can do an be anything they want? That it is always important to try, and never give up... That failure rates may far outweigh success rates, but that makes it even more important to keep trying... That being able to take care of themselves should be a priority... That happiness comes from within, and not from "having a partner" or "having a child"... That their lives don't have to be the same as everyone else's... That it's okay to focus on a career and not feel guilty about having disposable income... That the idea of a "family" goes beyond the old notion of consisting purely of a husband, wife and 2.5 children...

I wonder if dumbass bitch Penelope Trunk is married and has children/wants them?

Comments

Yup said…
http://jezebel.com/363668/canned-career-columnist-take-that-career-drive-and-direct-it-toward-mating

Jezebel does a little write up on the author and well, let's just say their opinion is very similar to your own. But check out her history, she's been at this for a while.
Vanessa said…
Holy crap! It's like the "make babies" mindset got into the journalism water.
Anonymous said…
i *just* read this article and was about to post on it...but you said EXACTLY what i was thinking.

WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON TODAY?!?!?!

and since when is whether or not i ever give birth to my own child suddenly EVERONE'S DAMN BUSINESS?!?!?!

ok. enough with the yelling.
Ron Newman said…
My problem with the article is ... what the hell is it doing on the front page of the Sunday Careers (help-wanted ads) section?

If you want to write a lifestyle piece, put it in Living/Arts or the Sunday Magazine. If you want to write a women's health piece, put it in Science & Health. But don't put it in Careers.
Anonymous said…
You make some great points but Penelope gets props for gettting under so many skins with this piece. So many women are talking about it because we drank the no-babies Kool-Aid when we were in our 20s and now we're fucked. We put so much energy into careers that we forgot to have babies. Now most men see the hunger in our eyes and just run the other way no matter how much clout and cash we have in the bank. Penelope did a service by reminding us of a simple biological reality.
Me said…
I'm sorry, Anonymous, but I COMPLETELY DISAGREE WITH YOU.

Dumb Ass Bitch Penelope Trunk is only doing the staunch right-wing conservatives who scream for a return to the bullshit "traditional family values" a favor. It's called, "Let's scare the crap out of women for being go-getters! Let's do our best to make them feel guilty for pursuing careers before babies!"

So, I don't believe there is any "Kool-Aid" to speak of... I prefer to call it, "Let's teach women at an early age that there is more to life than being a mom or someone's spouse."

I don't think men see any "hunger" in our eyes. You (Miss Small-Minded Anonymous) make it sound like all women who choose to pursue their careers are power-hungry materialistic witches. And we're not. (At least I'm not. Nor are my friends.)

In fact, any man worth his weight in gold (like my husband) would tell you (Miss Small-Minded Anonymous) that they would prefer a woman who genuine in her choices and able to stand on her own in every sense. They want a woman who is always going to strive for her own happiness, and not make it her mission to make them miserable.

It's true, biology may not be on our side as we age into our 30s and 40s. BUT, I find it far more important and useful to say to women, "Look, statistically, 'these' are your chances for having babies after age 30. 'Here' are you chances of having a fulfilling and successful career if you wait to start your career till after you have kids. 'Here' are your chances for getting divorced if you marry before the age of 25. And 'here' are your chances of being happy and if you realize life has many possibilities and if one thing doesn't work out, it doesn't mean the end of the world. Now, go forth and do your best to make an informed decision."

I just don't believe that women should be taught that finding a husband is the most important thing in the world, followed by having a baby. It's ONE of the options in this world.

So, why couldn't Dumb Ass Bitch Penelope Trunk simply approach the topic that way in her article? Why couldn't she say, "Look ladies, you want babies? Do it now. But it's not the only option available to you."
Anonymous said…
She had trouble getting pregnant in her 30s, and now she has two autistic kids. So on this topic (and countless others) she thinks of herself as an expert. This expert recently announced her divorce. In that blog post she says:

"So really, I guess I have to say that you shouldn't take my advice about marriage, because I failed. But then I think, hold it, I have failed at least once in just about everything I have tried, and I think that's what makes my advice work. How do you know what you’re doing wrong if you are not failing?"

By that logic, I should get all my advice from the dumbest screw-up I can find.
Yeah, I had an uproarious tirade on the same subject. I had the pleasure of interviewing her for my podcast, which will air later this week, I'm sure you'll be curious to hear what she had to say...

you can check here for the podcast update:
www.getting-single.blogspot.com
Me said…
Thanks Single Girl! I look forward you listening to it!

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