Does "Human" Get Angry?
A few co-workers and I were just chatting about martinis. I said that I drink them on the rocks, with a twist. My co-workers both like them straight up, with olives.
"They say gin actually makes people angry when they drink it," one of them told me.
"Really?" I asked.
I don't know if I can believe in that though... Most of the time when The Husband, "Human", and I go out for dinner, he orders a Coke. There are times though when he will order a gin and tonic though.
"You mean you want a 'Sapphire and tonic,'" I correct him, and inform the server.
When he drinks these gin and tonics though, he doesn't get angry. He doesn't even get drunk. In fact, I've only ever seen him drunk once... And that was right before Christmas when he went to a holiday wine tasting party for work. He came home at midnight, after I was asleep in bed. And I woke suddenly to him peeking his head into the bedroom and staring at me.
"Jeeb-us, Human!" I screeched. "You scared the crap out of me!"
"Oh," said Human. "Sorry."
He then went on to talk about himself in the third person...
"Human's number one!" he proudly proclaimed. "Human drank every glass of wine he was given in the wine tasting! Human took down 12 glasses of wine! Human's number one!"
"You drank 12 glasses of wine?" I asked, wanting a confirmation. "Are you drunk?"
"Yeah baby!" he said. "This is me drunk!"
"Yeah..." I said, "I don't like 'drunk Human.' He's creeping me out."
So I know that wine, which The Husband never drinks, gets him drunk. But the gin and tonics do not. And they certainly don't make him angry.
In fact, I can't recall when I have seen The Husband angry.
I don't think Human gets angry.
"They say gin actually makes people angry when they drink it," one of them told me.
"Really?" I asked.
I don't know if I can believe in that though... Most of the time when The Husband, "Human", and I go out for dinner, he orders a Coke. There are times though when he will order a gin and tonic though.
"You mean you want a 'Sapphire and tonic,'" I correct him, and inform the server.
When he drinks these gin and tonics though, he doesn't get angry. He doesn't even get drunk. In fact, I've only ever seen him drunk once... And that was right before Christmas when he went to a holiday wine tasting party for work. He came home at midnight, after I was asleep in bed. And I woke suddenly to him peeking his head into the bedroom and staring at me.
"Jeeb-us, Human!" I screeched. "You scared the crap out of me!"
"Oh," said Human. "Sorry."
He then went on to talk about himself in the third person...
"Human's number one!" he proudly proclaimed. "Human drank every glass of wine he was given in the wine tasting! Human took down 12 glasses of wine! Human's number one!"
"You drank 12 glasses of wine?" I asked, wanting a confirmation. "Are you drunk?"
"Yeah baby!" he said. "This is me drunk!"
"Yeah..." I said, "I don't like 'drunk Human.' He's creeping me out."
So I know that wine, which The Husband never drinks, gets him drunk. But the gin and tonics do not. And they certainly don't make him angry.
In fact, I can't recall when I have seen The Husband angry.
I don't think Human gets angry.
Comments
I don't know about gin (I hardly ever drink it) but I do know that Red Bull turns me into an angry person. I yell at my friends and get pretty grumpy late at a club after a Red Bull and vodka or two, so I try not to go there.
His name rhymes with "Human." I mean, his last name does. And I always call him by his last name.
I don't even know what his first name is.