Dating Is For Those Who Do Not Fear Failure.
Gosh, I've been married five years now, and I still insist The Husband take me out on a date at least once a week. I bring this up because I was reading over on Jenn's blog about how she hadn't ever been on a real date until last Summer... And that shocked me. Because she is pretty feisty and fearless. And she is girlie. And dating means you get to be very girlie.
To me, dating means you get to take some time getting ready... You pick out an outfit. You are precise with your hair. You wear deodorant. The person picks you up, or you pick them up. You go out in public. You get to know each other. Sometimes there is a kiss good night.
Am I really lame for loving dating?
I don't really understand the whole "hooking up" concept with the young kids today. Does it mean sex? Does it mean kissing? Does it simply mean you met up and hung out? It's very vague. And I guess it is for a reason... To give you some privacy and to protect your feelings.
"Hooking up" - no matter what context it is used in or what it is referring to - is a very casual thing. But saying you "went out on a date" with someone is very clear in intention. You met someone, and one of you suggested an outing or meeting because there is romantic interest. It may work out and turn into something more. It may be a complete failure. And with dating, you have to accept that there will be failures. Some that are complete and total failures.
All throughout college and my first few years in the working world, I went on many dates. Not "meet ups" or "hook ups"... Dates. And 99% of them were failures. Either the guy was awkward, or he wasn't interested in me. Or it was clear that he was just a "player" and I wasn't interested in him. Or he secretly had a girlfriend he didn't tell me about. Or it turned out his parents were second cousins.
A variety of things lead to failure in dating. But that's the point. A date sets the intention for a romantic interlude, and it either works out or it doesn't. But you get to see what is out there in terms of relationships... And then, eventually, one works out long term.
Dating is for the fearless. And I am going to Bikram Yoga Teacher Training in the Fall. So I am clearly fearless.
Except when it comes to clowns. I fucking hate clowns. I would never date a clown.
To me, dating means you get to take some time getting ready... You pick out an outfit. You are precise with your hair. You wear deodorant. The person picks you up, or you pick them up. You go out in public. You get to know each other. Sometimes there is a kiss good night.
Am I really lame for loving dating?
I don't really understand the whole "hooking up" concept with the young kids today. Does it mean sex? Does it mean kissing? Does it simply mean you met up and hung out? It's very vague. And I guess it is for a reason... To give you some privacy and to protect your feelings.
"Hooking up" - no matter what context it is used in or what it is referring to - is a very casual thing. But saying you "went out on a date" with someone is very clear in intention. You met someone, and one of you suggested an outing or meeting because there is romantic interest. It may work out and turn into something more. It may be a complete failure. And with dating, you have to accept that there will be failures. Some that are complete and total failures.
All throughout college and my first few years in the working world, I went on many dates. Not "meet ups" or "hook ups"... Dates. And 99% of them were failures. Either the guy was awkward, or he wasn't interested in me. Or it was clear that he was just a "player" and I wasn't interested in him. Or he secretly had a girlfriend he didn't tell me about. Or it turned out his parents were second cousins.
A variety of things lead to failure in dating. But that's the point. A date sets the intention for a romantic interlude, and it either works out or it doesn't. But you get to see what is out there in terms of relationships... And then, eventually, one works out long term.
Dating is for the fearless. And I am going to Bikram Yoga Teacher Training in the Fall. So I am clearly fearless.
Except when it comes to clowns. I fucking hate clowns. I would never date a clown.
Comments
I think it's great that you and The Husband still have date nights. Too many of my married friends complain about losing that part of the relationship after marriage.
I look forward to the first dates and continued date nights!
P.S. Thanks for the link love :)
I love this because it's so true! Dating is fun, albeit scary and awkward at times, too, but well worth it. I wish more people dated these days.
My fear? Turkeys. Vile beings.
ahhhh! grumble grumble grumble!
Thanks for the post, I loved it!